January 25, 2013

Stefan's Blog: 20 Rules To Live by in 2013


1. Don’t hate based on differences

There is plenty of stuff worthy of hate in this world. There is no shortage of wicked, wretched evil that catches my ire. There are battles worthy of fighting. Each battle I enter into requires me to think, using a moral compass to judge how I feel and the position I should take. Hating someone for being different from you, or hating a concept or thing because it’s not what you’re used to, or because you don’t understand it, is stupid, distracting, harmful, a waste of energy, and, well, evil. I’ll hate you for it.

2. Know the difference between “sperm donor” and “Dad”

Dad is a title that must be earned. Every day.

3. Treat women right

If you’re gay, which is cool, I probably don’t have to mention this one for multiple reasons. For the straight guys, a life of being a gentleman feels better than multiple notches on a bedpost. If you have a deal with her about not sleeping with other people, then you don’t sleep with other people. You honor it, and expect her to as well.

Beyond that, know that women are our equals. They’re different, and do I ever love them for it, but equal. Embrace just how wonderful they are, not just for their bodies (which are awesome), but for what’s going on upstairs.

4. Do the right thing

There are ways to get ahead in life via dishonesty. Do it once and get away with it, and you’ll be tempted to do it again and again. Eventually, it will bite a huge chunk out of your ass. Call it karma, but it’s playing the odds. They do catch up to you.

5. Quit yer bitchin’

Know the difference between doormat and whiner. Sometimes, you’ve just got to suck it up.

6. Own up

If you make a mistake, admit it. If you do wrong, try to fix it. If you have responsibilities, live up to them. This isn’t elementary school. Be an adult and don’t blame your own shortcomings on someone or something else.

7. God hates a coward

Religion has nothing to do with it; this is just what my dad always says. There are risks in life worth taking, risks that accelerate you to a new level. Remember Morgan Freeman’s character in The Shawshank Redemption: “Terrible thing, to live in fear.” Fear can hold you back from being the man you’re meant to be.


8. Shovel your neighbor’s sidewalk

This is a metaphor. It might not snow where you live.

Do things that benefit others with no expectation of acknowledgement or reward. You will be rewarded, however. That warm feeling inside is it. Don’t discount its value as a contributing member of the human race.

9. Wear your seatbelt

Another metaphor. There are risks worth taking and stupid things people do to act cool.

Note that acting cool and being cool are different.

Wear a helmet, look before you leap, get some exercise, don’t smoke, cheeseburgers and chicken wings are a treat, not a staple, wrap your root… You get the idea.

10. Keep debt in check

There are things worth going into debt for, like a place to live (that you can afford), an education (that leads to a viable career), a new business venture that you’ve done a thorough risk analysis of, or a life-saving medical procedure. Gadgets, clothes, vacations, and cars shouldn’t qualify. If you can’t afford those things, don’t buy them.

11. Invest wisely

Don’t expect the government to look after you. If you want to eat something other than cat food and have walls that aren’t made of cardboard surrounding you in your golden years, you’d better get saving.

But this goes beyond retirement planning. You can also decide which relationships and careers are worth investing in, as well as to take the time, money and effort to invest in your own health and fitness to garner a positive ROI.

12. Lift something heavy

Cuz it’s awesome.

13. See your favorite band up close

At least once. Find a way to make it happen. You won’t regret it.

14. Speak their language

When you travel, buy a phrase book and try to see the world through another set of eyes. In other words, don’t be such an ethnocentric jackass.

15. Don’t be a junky

Whether it’s work, booze, drugs, Halo, Facebook, sex, porn, TV, food or gambling, know the line between pastime and addiction.

16. Plan ahead

Things are less likely to bite you in the ass that way. There you go. Planning ahead is ass protection.

17. When driving where kids might be playing, slow the f*ck down

Seriously, I will beat you. It takes only a second to ruin many lives, including your own.

18. Go outside

It’s nicer out there. The air is better, the light is brighter, and the world is more fun.

19. Be flexible

Things don’t always go the way you planned, so adapt and overcome. Be willing to adapt your thought processes and challenge your own assumptions as well. Chances are you haven’t got life completely figured out yet. Be willing to learn from others.

20. Have a least one good friend

Find someone you would travel across land in the middle of the night at a moment’s notice to bail out of jail. Someone whose back you will watch, not stab. Someone who inspires your loyalty. Someone who will do all these things for you in return.

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